Sandra Jean Anderson, RIP March 29th, 2001

This is a letter I wrote to my mother on the 10 year anaversary of her death.

Mom,

Wow, it’s been 10 years? Ten years since I gave you a hug, since I smelled your perfume, since you kissed me on the cheek and said “I love you, Rugrat.” Ten years. And a lot has happened. I’ve been at rock bottom so many times, I don’t even know if can see the light. But I’m getting there. I’m getting there because I know that’s what you would want.

I’m living with Aunt Diane now, and she has been amazing to me. I love her so much, I don’t know if I could be where I am today without her. she is amazing. I’m finding out things from her that I don’t remember from that first year you were gone. She’s been there for me though it all. And I should have just come to her sooner. But I’m just like you, mom. Thickheaded, thinking I can to this on my own. But she’s given me the kick I need, and now I’m going to be starting college soon. Can you believe it mom? College.

I’ll be doing what I’ve always loved: helping people. I can remember many times when we took road trips in your vehicle, rescuing people from ditches and providing food and transportation to the nearest gas station so that they could give loved ones a call. And I would be right beside you, even though some of the people were kind of creepy. But your heart was always too big to let anyone stay out in the could.

I miss you mom. I miss you so much I weep sometimes. But I know you’re still there, watching over me, giving me those little nudges in the right direction, making me feel better when I need it. I can feel you around me; sometimes even see you in my dreams. It makes me feel better, but its not the same. Even now you are still a big part of my life. I think of you often, and always wonder if you would approve.

Looking back on some of the things I’ve done, I know you wouldn’t have approved. But again, you know me. I’ll offer help before I can ask for it. I’m learning, though.

The man I’m with right now is amazing. A real teddy bear. His name is tom, he’s 23, and he spoils me rotten. He already owns his own house! I’m really beginning to fall in love with him. I’m not going to say that he’s ‘the one’ yet, but he could be.

Well, is suppose, back to work I go. I miss you, and I love you with all my heart.

Love your Daughter,

Nikki

Ami Cactus

Something else i crocheted for my boyfriend...this time I can actually find who to credit!~
K & J Dolls, you can find her blog here She is amazing at what she does, and I love her patterns! I again made this using Read Heart SS and an I hook. I omited the bow because it was for my boyfriend and well, that makes it look girly, but if I ever make one for myself I'll use it!

Crocheted Fox

This is a shot of the crocheted Fox I made for my boyfriend. He's in love with foxes, and I gave it to him before I could snap a pic, so I had him snap one. Its made from Red Heart SS and using an I hook. Once I find the author of the pattern *i know its on my blogroll, somewhere...* I'll post it as well. AND, I'll take a few better pictures when I go over to my BF's place. (sorry hunni, but your photogrophy lacks...)

HA FOUND IT: http://greatamigurumi.blogspot.com/2010/04/little-fox.html i knew i had it somewhere... anyway, thanks!

A B C of Me

I thought I'd go and revive this prompt from one of my old blogs. It gave me something to do for about 5 min, at least...

A - Age: 20
B - Bed size: Full
C - Chore you hate: Mopping, sweeping and cleaning out bird cages…
D - Dog's name: the most recent one is Rosco  
E - Essential start your day item: A cigarette...though I'm trying to quit!
F - Favorite color: Pink, like, hot bright omg pink
G - Gold or Silver: SILVER
H - Height: five foot seven inches
I - I am: An extraordinary crocheter and writer, hard worker, lover, fighter, and ultimately my own person. Let’s not forget cute, too! =^.^=
J - Job: Abby Vans Inc.  
K - Kids: none, thank the good goddess!
L - Living arrangements: With my wonderful Godparents, whom I love very very much!
M - Mom's name: Sandra Jean Anderson (RIP March 29, 2001)
N - Nicknames: Nikka, Nikki, Pixie, Crystal, Pinky

O - Overnight hospital stay other than birth: Honestly? I can’t remember….
P - Pet Peeve: People who take advantage of others!
Q - Quote from a movie: And so the Lion fell in love with the lamb...Edward Cullen, Twilight

R - Right or left handed: I  can use both
T - Time you wake up: 10:30am ish, depending on if I’m working that day or not..
U- Underwear: Yep
V - Vegetable you dislike: Beats, BLECH
W - Ways you run late: Not waking up on time
X - X-rays you've had: back, lungs, heart, teeth, leg, foot, and hips O.o

Y - Yummy food you make: everyone seems to like my meat loaf...
Z - Zoo favorite: Umm…well, any big cat really. Tigers are my absolute fave, but I still go ‘squee’ over any large cat.

Tom and I

Better, hun? XD I'm posting this picture of my boyfriend Tom and I because he's been giving me crap about it. I still love him though, he's the best!

Randomness

So this is me, the most recent picture of me at least, at my work station (which becomes cluttered as all hell when i get there, and this pic was taken shortly after arrival today). I got my hair chopped, so its UBER short and a lot easier to mannage for the upcoming spring/summer months. Now, if only I could cure the cowlick....

Anywyay, thought I'd update my blog a bit as the phones are not ringing (I get a total of maybe a call an hour, and thats if its super busy on weekends) and I have nothing better to do. I updated some of my previous posts with the promised pics, as well.

Me with longer, more unruly hair, wearing the only green bay packer thing i had- A pom pom headband I made! Yes, i did geek out when the packers won, but like I said, I was still poor at that time.

And last but not least, a crocheted item! A Sansa Fuze cozy I made because I was sick of the damn thing getting all scratched up all the time, and because I lost the other one -.- Anyway, I made this using Red heart Sock yarn in 2 different colors. If anyone wants the pattern, let me know, and I can write it up. Its fairly simple. The heart was made using Red Heart's free 'heart' pattern.

I NEED MORE ROCKSTAR!!!!

(his two best friends geeking out about some game on the flatscreen while he burries himself in the corner with the 3DS, thats his hand in the whiteish blur)

So i'm here with my amazing boyfriend Tom for the weekend. he kidnapped me shortly after I got done with work Friday night, and whisked me away to his home in the teeny tiny town of Rome, WI. Unincorperated, but with a rad firedepartment (I only say that because he works for the firedepartment, not because I'm biased twards his or anything :P) I'm going to be here for the WHOLE weekend (well, at least another 2 ish days, since its already Sunday) and I'm so excited. I love spending time with him, his cat and his roomie's ferrets (yep, ferrets. They are so cute!) and i'm not looking forward to leaving to go back to work. Not because I dont like my job, but because i dont like leaving him. we get to see eachother roughly every 2 weeks, and while it is nice its also very painful on my part to leave. i feel like i belong here. partally because when i'm here his kitchen actually gets used and the house kinda sorta gets cleaned, and partally because i know it'll be another 2 weeks before i see him again. he makes me feel wanted and loved.

(the 3DS my wounderfuly awesome boyfriend gave me because he is awesome and I love him!)

But before i get super super mushy, I should move on to the next topic. The reason why he kidnapped me this weekend is because last night at midnight it was the premiere release of the 3DS. And of course, he got me one, even though I told him it was WAY TOO EXPENSIVE. But doe he listen to me? No! *sigh* What's a girl to do? Take it in stride of course! He got me a game called Monkey Balls and its basically a ripoff of Mario cart and super smash brothers combined. Its also multiplayer, which is why he got it. Its pretty fun, I only played a couple of rounds with his friend before I decided that 3am was my limit. I don't remember what time he came to bed, but I know it must have been late because I woke up at 10:45am and he still wasn't conscious.